4 Reasons We Like to Hang Out at BORDERS

10 Jan

I didn’t post yesterday, so today I’m making up for it by spreading two loads of torture onto the world: I’m writing twice! This is number post #1 and I can’t think of anything worthwhile to write about, so I’ll just start writing about yesterday until something interesting catches my attention.

Summary of Mike’s World, January 9, 2011.

I woke up in a pissy mood yesterday because I had hours of “real” work to do, work I had put off for days. I avoided that work early on by doing laundry and washing dishes. When Jennifer returned from teaching her yoga class, we all went to BORDERS (woo hoo, more avoiding work).

Chloe finished off her gift card on a strawberry soda and a lime green harmonica, Ainsley, on a cocoa trio and a light-up bouncy ball. We end up here once a week as a family. Okay, here’s a topic…let’s switch from a summary of my day to…

Random People in a Random BORDERS

I love these strange people.

4 Reasons we like to hang out at BORDERS

  1. In Borders I’m not reminded of the real world. At home (in reality) there’s always shit to do. There’s always dirty things that need cleaned and kids and animals that seem to always want to eat. Also, at home, cats are constantly excreting into a plastic box. They then expect someone (me) to shovel it out. This never ends and it always stinks. But I don’t smell a thing anymore though because I automatically hold my breath the entire time I’m anywhere near the stinky box of poo poo. In Borders, other people clean stuff, and I’ve yet to see a cat in there burying a turd. Also, in Borders, I never hear “Daddy, fix me a taco.”

    The shit I deal with.

  2. In Borders there are books all over the place. I like to look at books. I like the smell of books. I love the sound of a page turned. I love reading accessories like bookmarks, book lights, lap desks, journals, notebooks, pens, and paper. I also love to see other people reading.
  3. In Borders, the girls behave better. They get to go off on their own to read, play, explore and they know they can’t get into a loud, screaming fight calling each other poopy head or fart tart every five minutes.
  4. In Borders, the coffee tastes better and they have a milk frother. The insulated, green Starbucks mug I use holds around 16 oz. of coffee, which equates to their medium, but, for some reason, they charge me for a small. Since I’m a Hardcore Borders Rewards Member, we get 10% taken off everything we buy there, including coffee. So my coffee with steamed soy costs a measly $1.50. I can barely save a starving child with that. I can buy a bag of their coffee, take it home, brew it up and it tastes nothing like the coffee I enjoy there. Why is that? See 1, 2 and 3.


One Response to “4 Reasons We Like to Hang Out at BORDERS”

  1. sittingpugs January 10, 2011 at 10:54 am #

    I used to like hanging out at Borders…and then their cafe was replaced by Seattle’s Best, many of the locations near where I live got rid of their full media section, and their bathrooms keep getting more unfragrant and unsightly with each visit.

    I do, however, like that Borders has a Horror section in books.

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