I thought I might run this morning. I got up at 5:40 and quickly decided not to. I went outside to grab the New York Times from the driveway. It was cold and rainy. For a second I felt better about not running. I can’t run anyway; it’s raining!
But before I had my hand on the paper my mind went to my running gear:
- Arm warmers
- Running gloves
- Water-proof cap
- Head band
- Face mask
- Water-proof jacket
- Running pants
Weather excuses don’t fly, but I have other obstacles, like coffee and comfort.
The walk from my bed down the stairs to the kitchen is foggy and difficult. I’m cold and cranky. I tell myself I can’t run before I have coffee. That’s bullshit, of course.
The walk from the kitchen down the stairs to my office is filled with anticipation. I’m carrying my coffee and the newspaper. I almost want to run to my chair and to the blanket I keep near. I turn on the big TV to Morning Joe on MSNBC. The two PC monitors flicker to life. I call it my command center. The gray cat settles in my lap.
I visit Gmail, Politico, The Daily Beast, Kindle Dail Deal, maybe Facebook. Sometimes I write. I have about 40 minutes to myself before before attention shifts to the dogs and kids. That means making oatmeal, packing lunches, walking and feeding the dogs, seeing one kid off, waking the other, cleaning, and on and on.
It’s nice to get the hard things out of the way early. In the past I have. Now I start my day in comfort, but it leaves me feeling guilty and anxious about when that run will come, or the other “hard” stuff I put off.